u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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