I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
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