i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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