drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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