She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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