Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
