i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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