Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
