I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
