This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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