what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
