So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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