i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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