Tell her she can't have a vagina
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
