drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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