I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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