Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
