I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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