i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
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