I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
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I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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