They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
this will be a night to untag.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
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