I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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