If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
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