do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
