Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
