Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
