dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
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My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Your topless pictures make me question reality
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
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At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
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