Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
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