I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize
