The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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