Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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