garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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