go do what you do best...puke behind churches
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
