We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
My dick has a subreddit
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Randomize
