that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
