Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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