Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Randomize
