if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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