He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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