She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
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She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
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I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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