Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I'm like, not good at living.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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