dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
