So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Randomize
