Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
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