OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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