We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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