No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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