He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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