Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
