I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
