This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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