So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
